Pas du Tout blazer – Josephine headband
Photos by Emil Costrut
More than 95 percent of the women I meet tell me that they notice the fact that I feel so extremely confident in my body. And that`s seductively magnetic.
But this is not entirely true. I don`t feel extremely confident with my body. Not all the time. I have doubts. I feel guilty sometimes too, especially for being a couch potato. I have my little frustrations. I don`t feel sensual all the time.
I have big boobs. Mannnn, why do I always have to wear a bra and can`t wear open back dresses?
I don`t have a flat tummy, actually I look like I have a beer belly. Goodbye swimming suits pictures.
My butt is practically completely absent.
My skin is not soft enough.
Gooooodddd, my noseeeeee.
These thoughts are my own. And lately I realized that I’ve lived with them all my life. Well, technically just for the past three years, ever since my boobs started to sag, my flat tummy ceased to exist and my butt…well, that was always missing, but I didn`t really notice :). I`ve just been ignoring them.
My secret is to never let them bring me down. I think it`s human to have doubts. This is what society does to us. But I never, never, never doubt myself more than 30 minutes per month. Literally. It`s a rule. Self-pity is allowed for 30 minutes per month. The rest of the time I`m just grateful for the way I look and I have fun working with what I`ve got, so to speak.
A few years ago I was terrified of growing old. Of hitting 30. It was a nightmare for me. Today I know that growing old brings along a special kind of balance and wisdom which you can`t achieve by any other means than through life experience. It also means acceptance. Of others too, but most importantly, of yourself.
Today I know that doubting myself is just a tiny process in getting to know me better, in working with my thoughts better, in loving myself better.
Today I know that keeping a positive vibe is more seductive than any body asset and that a great attitude is really magnetic. I also know that a confident attitude doesn’t come from having doubts but from learning how to process them and live with them.
Today I know that tomorrow I`ll probably have more reasons to doubt myself – wrinkles and grey hairs for example – but the secret is literally to keep on smiling.
Today I know that I`m perfect just the way I Am.
(chiar daca a fost nevoie sa-mi lipim sanii cu banda scotch pentru prima poza ca sa nu `dea pe afara`)